7 Ways People Give Away Personal Power

2021-10-10 ~ adminlife

It feels good to give, but that’s never true for your personal power. That’s yours, and whether you know it or not, you are likely to be giving it up every day.

7 Ways Personal Power is Lost

Being Passive

The only time it is acceptable to be passive is when you really don’t care. Letting people treat you like a doormat will drain your energy. Have enough personal power to stand up for yourself. Otherwise, people will keep on putting you down.

Giving Your Inner Critical Voice Mind Space

Be aware of your consciousness because that’s the critic that will drain you the most and keep on taking. If you find this becoming problematic, reinforcing affirmations are the weapon to use to halt it.

Toleration of Manipulation

Manipulators will keep on taking if you let them. People who constantly take with zero reciprocation are a drain on your energy. You have the power to decide to get away from that situation.

Trying to Please Everyone

You cannot be everything to everyone. You can be your best by your standards. Take actions that feel right to you and don’t try to into the norm of society to please everyone else.

Please yourself. Not society.

Being Judgmental

You may not be a judgmental person, but you are not immune to making snap judgments. Other people can influence your behaviour if you let them. Office gossip, friends talking down about someone else or neighbours talking about a new person moving into the house across the street. Those seemingly innocent conversations can bring about negative energy, influencing your behaviour around new people you meet.

Being Apologetic without Cause

The time for sorry is when you know you have made a mistake. Not when you need someone’s attention. For that, excuse me will do the same job. An easy way to be aware of your apologetic language is to make it a rule never to follow “I’m sorry” with “but.” I’m sorry but… contradicts the apology.

Focusing on Heartless Goals

This one needs some careful life planning to make sure you don’t fall victim to it because it is a massive barrier to attaining personal power.

An abundant life is more than your career. Life goals are about helping you reach your dream life. Not about what work will make you rich so you can buy material things to satisfy an ego. Focus on lifestyle goals that include family, relationships, finance, health, career – Inner satisfaction. Otherwise, you will continue working monotonous jobs, keep giving personal power away to unsatisfying relationships, and waste money trying to satisfy the need to fill a void.

You can book your 15-minute “Get to know you” call by clicking on the blue button below

and we can talk about how we can work together help you to conserve your personal power

To your success

Michael

P.S. What is holding you back from achieving the success in your life and career? For many people it is their Limiting Beliefs. Once you understand and remove your old limiting beliefs and replace them with new empowering beliefs, success becomes that much easier.

Check out my basic Limiting Belief, self-paced program at Confidence and Life Coaching by clicking on the logo below. This program will get you started on identifying 14 of the most common limiting beliefs, you will probably be familiar with some of them, and will give empowering beliefs to replace them in your life if you have them.

After completing the course you will be at the starting point of your success journey.

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5 Excuses That Derail Success

2021-10-03 ~ adminlife

No matter how impossible you might think something is to accomplish, there’s someone out there getting it done anyway. Most often, excuses are a way to justify fear of failure, fear of success, or a lack of resolve. Excuses get in the way of success and living fully.

By overcoming your excuses, success becomes much more likely!

Avoid letting these excuses sabotage the life you desire:

I don’t have the right education. A surprising percentage of the most successful people never completed high school. It’s true that education is required to be a doctor, lawyer, or engineer, but education isn’t required in many situations.

- Our society places a high emphasis on education, but it’s not always necessary. Motivation and commitment are far more valuable than education in most cases. How committed are you?

I don’t have enough money. Many of those wealthy in the present were poor in the past. Some of the biggest companies were started in a one-car garage. Money certainly makes things easier, but it’s not always necessary to get started.

- A lack of financial resources is a convenient excuse to stay stuck in your current situation. The world is full of money. If you don’t have enough money to move forward, find a way to acquire more.

I don’t have enough time. With careful planning, you can find time in your schedule for your priorities. How much extra time do you need to achieve your goals?

- You might need to eliminate some of the activities that aren’t as crucial to making your dreams come true, such as club meetings.
- If you regularly overextend yourself by saying Yes every time someone asks you to do something, practice politely saying No until you can sometimes make that your answer.
- Delegate some of your responsibilities.
- Cut down on watching television. You’d be surprised how much you can get done during the time you usually spend watching shows on TV or the internet!

It’s too late to get started. Do you think life has passed you by? An 80 year-old man climbed Mount Everest successfully. People over the age of 60 have graduated from medical school. Is it really too late? It’s possible that your age or life circumstances can make success more challenging, but it’s unlikely that it’s too late.

- What can you do today to take that first step?

I don’t know how to get started. There was a time when Tiger Woods didn’t know how to play golf and Warren Buffett couldn’t even spell “stock.” It might be true that you don’t know how to get started. That just means you require some education.

- There’s never been a time in history when more free information was available. You can find anything you need to get started online or at the local library. And there’s no law that states you can’t sit in the bookstore all day and read to your heart’s content.

If you feel that success is eluding you, thoughtfully consider the possibility that you might be making excuses. You might discover that what you thought was stopping you all along was really you! Now that you know, you can get past your excuses and on the path to success.

You can book your 15-minute “Get to know you” call by clicking on the blue button below

and we can talk about how we can work together to help you overcome your excuses so that you can be more successful.

To your success

Michael

P.S. you know that living a life that is in balance is important. When you can balance your work, family, health, relationships, fitness and money, you feel better and can achieve your goals. You have the support of your family and friends which makes life worth living.

Check out my programs at Confidence and Life Coaching by clicking on the logo below:

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5 Signs That You’re a Perfectionist

2021-09-26 ~ adminlife

Perfectionism is about avoiding feelings of shame and inadequacy. By being perfect, you have permission to not feel bad about yourself. However, you never quite feel good about yourself. Perfectionists aren’t trying to achieve something great. They’re trying to avoid something negative.

A perfectionist can enjoy a few perks. Many people admire perfectionists. However, the disadvantages usually aren’t worth it.

Being a perfectionist has several disadvantages:

You waste a lot of time. Some things don’t require a high level of attention. To spend more time than necessary is a waste of an important resource: your time. If success is important to you, allocating your time wisely is an important consideration.
It creates a lot of stress. When there’s only one way to be successful at something, there’s no room for error. Perfectionists aren’t happy people. There’s a constant anxiety that can can’t be completely satisfied.
You lose sight of the big picture. Bogging yourself down with trivial details can limit your awareness of the bigger objective.
You’re never happy with your results. You might be satisfied, but you’re never happy.

Being a perfectionist limits your efficiency and effectiveness. There are signs that many perfectionists share.

Signs to Be Aware Of

Decide if you’re trying to be too perfect:

You take things too far. No matter what you do, you take it to the limit. Everything has to be done as well as possible, whether it’s folding the laundry, parking the car, or doing something more meaningful.
You long for your high school days. High school is perfect for perfectionists. The competition isn’t too great on the average, and your achievements are witnessed by all. Your work is also clearly judged quantitatively. You know exactly where you stand.
You’re judgmental of others. Your standards of acceptability are so high that no one can consistently achieve them. If you find yourself with less friends than you’d like, your commitment to be perfect might be the primary cause.
You’re too hard on yourself. By the same token, you can’t live up to your expectations either. This leads to feelings of disappointment and shame. Are you more successful than most of the people you know, but less pleased with yourself than they are with themselves? Do you find it hard to be proud of yourself?

- Do you feel happy and proud when you’re successful, or do you merely feel a sense of relief?

You procrastinate excessively. The need to be perfect creates anxiety and makes it hard to get started. You know you’re in for a lot of work and self-induced drama. Under those circumstances, anyone would be hesitant to get started!

What Can You Do if You’re a Perfectionist?

Try these techniques:

Determine how much time is reasonable for completing the task. Ask a successful friend how long she would spend, and limit yourself to that amount of time. You’ll soon learn what’s reasonable.
Stay focused on the most important activities. Perfectionists spend too much time on minor details. Ask yourself which activities will yield the most results for the time spent.
Learn to accept being less than perfect. Notice that no one else cares if something is less than perfect. You don’t need to beat everyone. Strive to attain a high level of quality with a reasonable amount of effort and time.

Perfectionists believe they’re committed to excellence, but they’re actually avoiding feelings of inadequacy. If you’re a perfectionist, ask yourself why. What do you gain? What does it cost you? Do you take pleasure from being perfect? How do you feel when you’re less than perfect?

If you discover that you’re a perfectionist, each day practice doing something well, but not perfect. It may take a while, but soon enough, you’ll be enjoying the benefits of excellence rather than the disadvantages of perfectionism.

Book a 15-minute “Get to know you” call by clicking on the blue button below

and we can talk about how we can work together to make you aware that you don’t have to be perfect to be successful.

To your success

Michael

Check out my programs at Confidence and Life Coaching by clicking on the logo below:

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

Life-Altering Questions to Ask Yourself

2021-09-19 ~ adminlife

Questions are a valuable tool. By asking yourself questions, you can change your focus and the direction of your life. The proper question can open you up to new possibilities and ideas. Take the time to examine your life and ensure you’re on the best possible path.

Ask yourself these questions on a regular basis:

Have I seen enough to have an accurate view of the world? It’s surprising how many people have never crossed their state line. The northeastern part of the United States is very different from the South, Midwest, or other parts of the country. Europe is very different from Africa.

- You’re missing out on a lot if you don’t explore other places and cultures. What are the odds that you were born in the precise place that fits you the best?

Will my finances be able to support my retirement? It’s important to start asking this question immediately. Focusing on the short-term at the expense of the long-term is a common error. You only have so many tomorrows to prepare for the latter parts of your life.
Where will I end up in five years if I live this day repeatedly? You might not have a time machine at your disposal, but you can probably predict the future better than you think. Our daily activities determine our future. Ask yourself these questions and project your answers over the next five years. What’s the logical outcome?

- What did I eat today?
- What did I do to earn money today?
- What social activities did I engage in today?
- How much exercise did I get today?

If today were my last day to live, what would I do? You probably wouldn’t spend your day in front of the TV or spend your time worrying about silly things. Whatever answer you receive is a good indication of how you should be spending more of your time each day.
Am I pleased with my career choice or would I rather do something else? Having multiple careers is much more common than it used to be. If you’re in a career you don’t enjoy, you have other options. Spending 40 years in a career that doesn’t excite you is a hard way to go through life.
What are my goals? If you don’t have any goals, how do you know where you’ll end up? Without goals, we’re relegated to choosing the best options that randomly pass through our lives. It’s much more effective to decide what you want and make it happen. Leave luck out of the equation.
Which parts of my life are making me unhappy? Becoming happier isn’t just about adding all the right components. It’s also about getting rid of the stuff that makes you miserable. The low-rated parts of your life make you unhappy. It’s not the fact that you don’t have a Ferrari in your driveway. Take out the trash before adding to your life.
Am I living my life in a way that supports my health? Young bodies can take a surprising amount of wear and tear without showing any signs of abuse. That doesn’t last. Taking care of yourself today improves the odds of enjoying good health down the road. Eat and sleep well. See your doctor on a regular basis.
Am I enjoying my life as much as I could? Are you too busy with work to notice all the good things in your life? Are you too worried to enjoy time spent with your children? You can experience many simple enjoyments every day.

It’s easy to get caught up in your old routine and never take the time to look around. By the time you lift your head, you realize you’re not where you want to be. Questions are one way to evaluate your life and create change. Be aware of your life and make conscious choices.

Book a 15-minute “Get to know you” call by clicking on the blue button below

and we can talk about how we can work together to make the changes in your life that will make you more successful.

To your success

Michael

Check out my programs at Confidence and Life Coaching by clicking on the logo below:

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7 Steps to Personal Growth

2021-09-12 ~ adminlife

Personal growth can help you make your life more enjoyable and fulfilling. However, if you’re broke, overweight, don’t have any friends, and lack goals, where do you begin? The key to beginning a personal growth journey is setting your priorities. There’s a lot you can do in five years, but you can’t do a whole lot in five months.

Spend your early efforts as effectively as possible:

Measure your current situation. Think about a typical day in your life. Then think about a typical weekend. Write down whatever comes to mind. A partial list might look like this:

- Get up for work. I hate getting up this early and I hate my job.
- In the shower – thinking about how I can’t pay my electric bill and still go out with my friends this weekend. I don’t like my body.
- Driving to work- I love my car
- Get home. The dog peed on the carpet.
- Watch TV. I don’t really like it, but I don’t have anything else to do.
- And so on.

Rate each of these experiences. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being perfect, rate each thought. It’s the low-rated parts of your life that are dragging you down. Avoid spending your time on raising a 7 to a 10. It’s the 1s, 2s, and 3s that are wreaking havoc. Until you’ve raised everything up to at least a 5, stick with the lower-rated items on your list.
Create a 10. Let’s suppose your weight is a big issue. You rate it a “2”, because it negatively impacts your confidence and self-esteem. It’s also becoming a health issue. You also believe that it hurts your social life. What is the perfect alternative? Write a little story.

- I’m on the bathroom scale, and my weight is 170 pounds. This is the perfect weight for me. I look and feel good in my clothes. My doctor is pleased with my cholesterol and blood pressure numbers. Women are starting to notice me again. I have the confidence to ask out Mary for this weekend.
- Now you have an objective that clearly addresses a challenging part of your life.

Consider the people in your life. If you want to enhance any part of your life, there will be people that attempt to hold you back. They might not do it intentionally, but it will happen. It’s hard to kick your mom out of your life, but many other people are optional.

- You may need to add people to your life. Perhaps you need a personal trainer or a few friends that have successfully lost weight. A few friends at the gym would be helpful, too.

What do you need? A cookbook with healthy recipes? A gym membership? A jump rope? Compare your needs with your current resources. Can you bridge the gap?
Focus on your habits. Your current situation is result of years of less-than-great habits. Better habits provide better outcomes. Make small changes to your daily habits. Then it’s just a matter of being compliant and patient.
Learn how to be uncomfortable. The faster you wish to change, the more discomfort you’ll face. You’ll have to slow down or accept that discomfort is part of the deal. The ability to deal with uncomfortable feelings grows with practice.

It’s daunting to change every aspect of your life, so don’t even try! Focus on the most negative parts of your life first. You can then turn your attention to the less-critical items. Beginning a personal growth journey is an exciting time. Good luck!

Book a 15-minute “Get to know you” call by clicking on the blue button below

and we can talk about changing your focus onto those areas of your life that will make the greatest impact.

To your success

Michael

Check out my programs at Confidence and Life Coaching by clicking on the logo below:

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