- You are going to run into people who are negative.
These people are toxic. They are the people that complain all the time and never offer any solutions as to how to make situations better. These are the people that put others down. They never have anything nice to say about others. They are not fun to be around, and they can bring your spirits down. They will even try to recruit you to their way of thinking. - Recognize when people are toxic.
There are several types of people that fall into the toxic category. One of the biggest types is the manipulator. What makes them the worst is that they make you seem like you are in the wrong. They get others to go against you. Other types include people who insult, gossipers, and people who love to sabotage everyone else, etc. There aren’t official definitions for toxic people. Therefore, it’s best to make judgment calls about the types of people. - When a person is toxic, this is different than just being annoying.
You may have a friend that has habits you aren’t fond of. Perhaps he or she talks too much, etc. This is not toxic behavior. Often, the annoying people aren’t nasty. They just have habits that you wish they would change. You can choose to spend less time with these people, but you don’t necessarily have to avoid them if they are good people deep down. If you feel these people with annoying habits are toxic to your well-being, you have the right to avoid them. - It’s important to trust your instincts about toxic people.
You will know who they are. Generally, when one of them is in your presence, you will become tense and defensive. People sometimes ignore these feelings, but they can help you keep away from the toxic people. - Don’t let people drag you into their toxic world.
Unfortunately, it’s easy to become negative. Toxic people love to recruit allies. It helps their cause. The trouble is you become one of them, and then people will try to avoid you at all costs. Therefore, you need to stay positive to counteract their ploys. - You shouldn’t try to change toxic people.
You run the risk of them becoming enemies. This will set you up as a target which makes it much more difficult to avoid these people. - Find people who will call you out when you are negative.
This concept is known as accountability partners. You can do the same for the partners when they become negative. You can find creative ways to penalize each other, i.e., putting money in jars, etc.
ACTIONABLE STEPS
| 1 | 2 | 3 |
| Make a list of the types of people who are toxic. These include manipulators, mean-spirited, people who engage in gossip, etc. When people make you or others feel bad, put them in a toxic category. The purpose of this action is to identify these people to avoid them. Recall that toxic is not necessarily the same as annoying. | Use affirmations. Set up daily affirmations to use for yourself and be consistent when using them. By doing this, you can deflect toxic people when they try to recruit you into their twisted worlds. You will have a much easier time ignoring what they say. It will also help you to avoid them when you see them in the first place. | Start associating yourself with positive people. Join support groups or groups that are focused on positivity. Everyone has the same twenty-four hours. You get to choose how you spend them. The more you expose yourself to positive experiences, the less chance toxic people have to spend with you. |
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