If you want to succeed in anything — career, relationships, sports or personal development — you need two essential traits: confidence and competence. They work together to create a powerful momentum that drives you forward, helps you tackle challenges and keeps you moving even when things get hard. When you combine a solid belief in yourself (confidence) with real, developed ability (competence), you create a foundation that makes success not just possible, but likely.
Confidence in your abilities to go after your goals can sometimes be difficult to find or keep.
It can sometimes take time to discover the confidence you have inside you. This can be especially true if you are trying something new.
I have a program that can help you to discover what is holding you back from achieving your goals as well as help you set an attainable goal related to where you are in your life and where you are trying to be.
This program also works with you to build up your confidence in being able to reach your goal.
You can find out more about this program at Confidology, a funny name but a serious program.
You can contact me to talk about this or any other aspect of confidence and success at michael@coachmichaelw.com
Visit the site and read through the program description.
If you are not ready to commit to a full program, I have a self-paced course on Udemy that may be of interest. You can find out about the course and register at Confidence and Motivation Development and Maintenance
This article breaks down the relationship between competence and confidence, why both matter and how to build them deliberately to fuel long-term success.
Confidence Needs a Solid Foundation
Confidence isn’t just about “feeling good.” It’s the belief that you can rise to meet any challenge. But here’s the truth: confidence that isn’t backed by competence doesn’t last. It collapses under pressure.
Real confidence grows from experience. When you’ve trained for something, studied it, practised it and failed enough to learn, your belief in yourself becomes grounded. This grounded confidence is unshakable — and that’s where competence comes in.
What Is Competence, Really?
Competence means knowing what you’re doing and being prepared to do it well. It’s not about being perfect. It’s about being equipped — mentally, emotionally and physically — to face a challenge head-on.
Competence includes:
- Acquiring deep knowledge or skill in an area
- Consistent practice and learning from feedback
- Willingness to take on hard tasks
- Preparing thoroughly before taking action
You don’t need to be the best to be competent. You just need to know enough and practice enough that you trust yourself when it’s time to act.
Competence Builds Confidence — Step by Step
Think of confidence like a spotlight. It shines brighter when it has something solid to rest on. That “something” is competence. Every time you take action, learn something new or practice a skill, you’re stacking bricks under your confidence. Over time, you build a stable platform that keeps you from crumbling under pressure.
Here’s how the cycle works:
- You learn something.
- You practice it.
- You get better.
- You feel more capable.
- You take on more challenges.
- Your confidence grows.
That cycle is how confident people are built — not born.
Set Goals That Build Competence
Too many people chase confidence without doing the groundwork. Confidence grows when you prove to yourself that you can follow through. That starts with goal setting.
Break goals down into achievable steps. These micro-goals help you build competence in stages. For example:
- Want to become a confident speaker? Start by learning the basics of presentation structure. Then practice speaking for 2 minutes. Then 5. Then in front of a friend. Then a group. Each step builds competence — and with it, confidence.
- Want to get fit? Learn about nutrition and form. Start with manageable workouts. Build consistency before intensity.
Competence is earned, not guessed. The better you get at something, the more confident you’ll feel doing it.
Face Challenges With Determination
People with both competence and confidence don’t avoid difficulty. They lean into it. That’s because they trust their ability to figure things out — even if they haven’t mastered it yet.
Challenges aren’t threats; they’re opportunities to stretch.
Confident, competent people:
- Don’t fear failure. They see it as feedback.
- Don’t quit easily. They adjust and try again.
- Don’t let success slow them down. They look for the next level.
Mistakes are data, not doom. When you treat every setback as a chance to learn, your competence expands — and your confidence gets tougher.
Organization, Preparation and Action
Confidence without preparation is a bluff. Competence without action is wasted. You need all three: organization, preparation and follow-through.
Let’s break it down:
- Organize your goals.
Know what you’re working toward. Write it down. Define what success looks like. - Prepare for the effort.
Do your research. Learn the tools or skills you need. Practice. Rehearse. - Take focused action.
Execute without overthinking. Get feedback. Adjust. Repeat.
When you work like this consistently, you earn your confidence. And you can trust it because you built it on results.
From Competent to Confident to Inspiring
Once you’ve built that inner strength, people notice. When you walk into a room, they feel it. That’s because you’re projecting something real: earned confidence.
Here’s the interesting part — how others react to your confidence depends on them. Some may feel inspired. Others may feel threatened. Either way, your job is not to manage their reactions. Your job is to keep showing up, being prepared and acting with integrity.
Confidence that comes from competence:
- Inspires trust
- Attracts opportunities
- Makes you a role model, even when you’re not trying to be
This is how influence is born — not by pretending to know everything, but by steadily becoming the person who does the work.
Confidence is Built, Not Bought
Confidence and competence aren’t things you either “have” or “don’t.” They’re skills you develop over time. Every action you take toward growth — learning, practising, preparing, showing up — feeds your confidence. Every goal you achieve adds to your self-trust.
So if you’re chasing more confidence, don’t start with mindset tricks. Start with action.
Build your competence deliberately, and confidence will follow. Together, they’ll carry you further than talent or luck ever could.
To talk about any aspect of success or working with a Life Coach to help you to achieve success, you can book a 30-minute call by clicking on the blue button below.
Don’t try to do all of this by yourself, ask and receive the guidance that can get you moving towards your own success.
Working together can help you overcome personal and professional barriers, ensuring you reach your highest potential.
Nothing happens until action is taken.
To your success.
Michael
P.S Don’t forget to visit Confidology to learn more about the program. If you are not ready to commit to a full program, I have a self-paced course on Udemy that may be of interest. You can find out about the course and register at Confidence and Motivation Development and Maintenance
P.P.S if you want to find out more about my programs just check out the site Confidence and Life Coaching
P.P.P.S. If you enjoy reading these articles on my blog, I have more books that have more of this type of information that you can find out more about at Books to Read. You can buy these ebooks at many on-line book stores. The links to the bookstores are at the link above.
P.P.P.P.S. I have posted a series of articles on the “Fear of Success” at Confidence and Life Coaching. You can also request a free PDF of all 4-articles by sending me an email message at michael@coachmichaelw.com
Photo by Justin Morgan on Unsplash
