If your mind feels like it’s stuck on a loop — replaying conversations, worrying about the future, dissecting decisions — you’re not alone. Overthinking is one of the most common habits that drain confidence, cloud judgment and keep people stuck in stress and indecision.
Thinking deeply isn’t the problem. But when thinking turns obsessive, repetitive and unproductive, it becomes a trap. You get caught in mental quicksand, stuck in “what ifs,” and overwhelmed by analysis. It robs you of peace, clarity and momentum.
Confidence in your abilities to go after your goals can sometimes be difficult to find or keep.
It can sometimes take time to discover the confidence you have inside you. This can be especially true if you are trying something new.
I have a program that can help you to discover what is holding you back from achieving your goals as well as help you set an attainable goal related to where you are in your life and where you are trying to be.
This program also works with you to build up your confidence in being able to reach your goal.
You can find out more about this program at Confidology, a funny name but a serious program.
You can contact me to talk about this or any other aspect of confidence and success at michael@coachmichaelw.com
Visit the site and read through the program description.
If you are not ready to commit to a full program, I have a self-paced course on Udemy that may be of interest. You can find out about the course and register at Confidence and Motivation Development and Maintenance
Fortunately, you can retrain your brain to stop overthinking in its tracks. It won’t happen overnight, but with conscious effort and the right strategies, you can break the cycle.
Here’s how to do it — step-by-step.
1. Recognize the Pattern and Pinpoint Your Triggers
Awareness is your first line of defence. Most people don’t even realize when they’ve slipped into overthinking. By the time you notice it, you’ve already lost an hour of your day — or a night of sleep.
Start by watching for the signs:
- You replay a conversation or decision again and again.
- You feel mentally exhausted without taking action.
- You jump from one scenario to another, trying to control an outcome.
What to do:
- Name it: “This is overthinking.”
- Identify what triggered it — was it a decision, a worry, a social interaction?
- Track patterns: Does overthinking show up in work, relationships, health decisions or when you feel uncertain?
Knowing your triggers gives you the power to interrupt the cycle before it spirals.
2. Write It All Down — Clear It Out of Your Head
Your mind isn’t a storage unit. When you’re stuck in overthinking, it helps to get your thoughts out. Writing is one of the most effective tools for this.
Journaling forces you to slow down and organize the mental noise. You start to see what’s real and what’s just emotional static.
Try this approach:
- Write out exactly what you’re thinking. Don’t edit — dump it all.
- Identify facts vs. assumptions.
- Look for repetition: What thought keeps showing up?
You might start to notice patterns like catastrophizing, self-doubt or a need for control. Once you spot the loop, it loses power.
Bonus tip: Create a “worry window” — set aside 15 minutes a day to write down any fears or overthinking. When the habit shows up later, tell yourself: “I’ll think about this during my worry time.”
3. Calm Your Nervous System Before You Problem-Solve
When you’re anxious or overstimulated, your brain isn’t wired for good decision-making. You might think you’re solving problems by thinking more, but you’re actually spinning.
Before you respond to your thoughts — pause and calm down.
Ways to reset:
- Breathe deeply. Try box breathing: inhale 4 counts, hold 4, exhale 4, hold 4.
- Move your body. A short walk can shift your entire mental state.
- Engage your senses. Use grounding techniques like holding something cold, listening to calming music or lighting a scented candle.
- Take a break. Step away from the triggering situation for 10–20 minutes.
The goal is to return your body to a state where you can think clearly — then decide what needs action and what doesn’t.
4. Get a Second Perspective — Talk It Out
Overthinking loves isolation. It thrives in silence and secrecy. One of the most powerful ways to shut it down is by talking to someone you trust.
Even just saying your thoughts out loud can reduce their emotional grip. Often, you’ll hear yourself and think, “Wait, that doesn’t even make sense.”
Tips for a productive conversation:
- Choose someone who listens well and doesn’t jump to solutions.
- Be honest. Say: “I don’t need advice. I just need to say this out loud.”
- Ask questions like: “Am I missing something?” or “Does this sound like overthinking to you?”
If you need deeper guidance, consider talking to a coach or therapist. Having someone mirror your thoughts back with objectivity can be a game-changer.
5. Ground Yourself in the Present Moment
Overthinking is almost always about the past (regret) or the future (fear). Rarely are you obsessing over what’s happening right now.
The cure? Get present.
How to return to now:
- Name five things you can see, four you can touch, three you can hear, two you can smell, one you can taste.
- Focus on your breath. Count each inhale and exhale for one minute.
- Do one mindful task — wash dishes, fold laundry or drink tea — without multitasking.
You’re not trying to stop thoughts completely. You’re just reminding your brain: “This is where I actually live. Not in the past. Not in the future. Here.”
Bonus Tip: Practice Decision Hygiene
Many people overthink because they fear making the “wrong” choice. But indecision is more costly than imperfection. You can always adjust — but you can’t recover lost time.
Start practising what’s known as decision hygiene:
- Set a deadline to decide. Don’t let decisions bleed into days.
- Get clear on what “good enough” looks like.
- Remind yourself: “I can make adjustments. But I won’t waste energy on imaginary outcomes.”
Confidence isn’t built on perfect decisions — it’s built on making decisions, learning and moving forward.
You Can Reclaim Your Mental Space
Overthinking is a habit — not a personality trait. It’s not something you’re doomed to live with forever. The key is awareness, not avoidance. You don’t fight overthinking by thinking harder. You break it by grounding yourself, interrupting the loop, and getting back into action.
The goal is progress, not perfection. Each time you recognize a spiral and choose a better response, you’re rewiring your brain.
You’re building a new habit — one of clarity, calm, and confidence.
To talk about any aspect of success or working with a Life Coach to help you to achieve success, you can book a 30-minute call by clicking on the blue button below.
Don’t try to do all of this by yourself, ask and receive the guidance that can get you moving towards your own success.
Working together can help you overcome personal and professional barriers, ensuring you reach your highest potential.
Nothing happens until action is taken.
To your success.
Michael
P.S Don’t forget to visit Confidology to learn more about the program. If you are not ready to commit to a full program, I have a self-paced course on Udemy that may be of interest. You can find out about the course and register at Confidence and Motivation Development and Maintenance
P.P.S if you want to find out more about my programs just check out the site Confidence and Life Coaching
P.P.P.S. If you enjoy reading these articles on my blog, I have more books that have more of this type of information that you can find out more about at Books to Read. You can buy these ebooks at many on-line book stores. The links to the bookstores are at the link above.
P.P.P.P.S. I have posted a series of articles on the “Fear of Success” at Confidence and Life Coaching. You can also request a free PDF of all 4-articles by sending me an email message at michael@coachmichaelw.com