Things That Can Ruin Your Life and How to Avoid Them

2022-04-06 ~ adminlife

No person ever sets out to ruin their lives. It’s impossible to find someone that will make a New Year’s resolution to ruin their life.

Children don’t daydream about how much they’d love to become alcoholics in the future. Students don’t attend classes on how to go bankrupt.

Couples don’t dress up, spend so much money on a wedding, and show up at the altar while planning to get a divorce a few years later.

The point is, nobody plans to fail. But failure happens whether we like it or not.

And our failures are the result of our choices. We often don’t willingly make choices that we know will cause us to fail.

So, how can we avoid making poor decisions that will end up ruining our lives? These ideas can help:

Stop entertaining the idea that your actions don’t have consequences. You may think you’re doing it for fun, but your actions have consequences.
- For example, if you fail to pay your bills, you may get chased down by a debt collector. If you tell a lie, you may upset others. If you smoke, you may eventually develop emphysema.
- Whatever happens, every action you take has a consequence. And you can’t change the consequences or pick and choose what will happen.

- Your actions either lead you to your goals or lead you away from your dreams. It’s the difference between winning and losing.

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Live within your means. It is always better to plan and make smart financial decisions. Today, many people have no problem living beyond their means because they believe that it’s okay.

- Unfortunately, this will only lead to a difficult financial situation in the future. The social media lifestyle causes a lot of people to get carried away with the allure of a lifestyle they know they can’t afford.

- To avoid this trap, focus on what matters the most in your life. Many older people today are paying for things they accepted years ago. They still have mortgages, kids, and day-to-day costs that they have trouble covering.

- They scrimp on health care and end up sick for a long time.

Break any forms of addiction, including drugs, pornography, or shopping. Habits like these have a very negative impact on your life. The sad reality is, many people suffer some form of addiction today.

- Addictions lead to feelings of loneliness, and they don’t fill your life with good things. Some even cost your life. People find it challenging to break addictions because they feed them.

- It doesn’t take a single day to form a habit – it usually requires repetition to develop one. An alcoholic doesn’t become one by drinking one beer. The more he drinks, the stronger the addiction becomes.

- Eventually, he has no choice but to keep drinking. That’s the case with most addictions. Anything that is a drug or habit-forming has the potential to ruin your life.
- The solution? Stop feeding them.

Avoid assuming that you’re the only one going through your painful situation. Sometimes we gravitate towards others who share our problems, but it’s all too easy to think no one else exists out there who’s struggling like us.

- The truth is, you’re not alone. And thinking you’re alone is usually just an excuse you give yourself.

- Instead of making such assumptions, why not reach out? Talk to others and tell them what’s going through your mind. You might discover that they’re going through something similar. Once you’ve connected with those around you, you’ll be able to realize you’re not alone.

There are so many things that can ruin our lives. And sometimes, we only need to look at the path others ahead of us have set to realize what a mistake we make to live a certain way. And that’s okay, because this isn’t the end. We haven’t given up. We’re only getting started.

To work together to help you get moving in the right direction in your life, click on the blue button below to book a 15-minute, no obligation “Get to know you” call.

Going alone on creating a better life is difficult. Find out how working with a Life Coach can make the journey to success and a better life easier.

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To your success

Michael

P.S. you know that living a life that is in balance is important. When you can balance your work, family, health, relationships, fitness and money, you feel better and can achieve your goals. You have the support of your family and friends which makes life worth living.

Check out my programs at Confidence and Life Coaching by clicking on the logo below:

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Learn to Achieve More, Even When You’re Unmotivated

2021-12-22 ~ adminlife

Motivation can be an issue for many of us. While motivation is great, there are many things in our lives that need to be done, regardless of whether motivation is there to propel us. Most of us need to go to work, brush our teeth, pay our bills, and more. It really doesn’t matter whether we’re motivated. These things still have to be done.

Unfortunately, the tasks listed above are usually done from a place of negative motivation. We do them because the consequence of not doing them is so uncomfortable. But it works.

However, negative motivation usually won’t work when there isn’t an immediate negative consequence. For example, it’s easy to put off exercising and to sit on the couch instead.

What’s important is to create a system that makes your challenging activities more appealing. It’s also important to make it easy to get started. Thinking too much makes it easy to talk yourself out of taking action.

Try this system to achieve more of what you want, regardless of your motivation:

Accept the fact that you might not “feel” like taking action. The best athletes in the world don’t always feel like training. The most successful business people in the world don’t always feel like going to the office.
Create a compelling future. Think about how much you’ll gain by taking action and moving toward your goals.

- Think far into the future and then bring it back to the next few months. Imagine how great it will feel when you’re really making significant progress.

Consider what will happen if you don’t take action. Most of us keep living the same day over and over. If you want your life to change, it will take some new actions.

- Imagine how you’ll feel if your life is exactly the same next year.

Make a list of the most important actions. What activities will create the greatest results? Frequently, these are the actions that are less than enjoyable. But if you can get yourself to do these things, nothing can stop you.
Create a schedule. What are you going to do each day to make your compelling future come true? When are you going to do the activities you identified in the previous step? During what part of the day are you the most productive? Make it easy to get started.
Reward yourself. When you successfully stick to your schedule, reward yourself. You could go get a massage at the end of the week or head out to your favourite restaurant. Choose something that appeals to you and makes you want to get busy.
“Punish” yourself. Create some additional motivation by setting up a punishment if you come up short. Maybe you’ll have to clean all the toilets in the house. Maybe you’ll go run a mile.
Re-evaluate at the end of the day. What did you do well? What could you have done better? Start over tomorrow with your analysis to guide you.

Motivation is great, but if we all waited to be inspired by motivation, little would ever get accomplished. Commitment will usually result in greater accomplishment than motivation. Learn to get started and be “self-motivating.” All anyone really needs is to get busy. Avoid waiting for inspiration. Get things done and your success can serve as inspiration.

You can book your 15-minute “Get to know you” call by clicking on the blue button belowand we can talk about how we can work together

To your success

Michael

Check out my programs at Confidence and Life Coaching by clicking on the logo below:

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8 Reasons That Explain Why You Fail

2021-08-01 ~ adminlife

Everyone that’s ever tried to accomplish anything knows what it’s like to fail. While there are numerous reasons for failure, most of them can be boiled down to just a few possibilities.

Understanding why you failed is important, because it educates you on how to improve your odds for success in the future.

See if you can identify the cause of your most significant failures in this list of common reasons.

These reasons may help you to understand why you failed:

Failing to learn from past experiences. You have the opportunity to be a little bit better at life each day. Every day you’re on this planet, you’re learning new things.
- Each success, failure, neutral result, and interaction with others is a learning moment that you can apply to the future.
- Analyze each day. What did you do well? Where did you go wrong? If you don’t evaluate your day and your results, you won’t recognize what you’ve learned.
Not acquiring the necessary knowledge. The more you know about what you’re trying to accomplish, the better your approach can be. When you first begin any new task, your knowledge is likely to be insufficient to ensure success.
- Spend some time learning a little more each day. However, it’s important to avoid the common tendency to spend too much time learning and not enough time doing. This is just another form of procrastination in many cases.
Avoiding commitment. Determination and regular effort are important components of success. Many failures are due to a lack of commitment.
Distractions. Life is full of appealing distractions today. It’s never been easier or less expensive to find mesmerizing distractions than it is right now. Eliminating unnecessary distractions will do a lot to enhance the odds of your success.
- Ideally, your objective will be the most interesting option available to you – more interesting than social media, cat videos, or mindlessly watching the TV.
Fear of failing. The fear of failure might be the most common fear. We fear wasting our time, embarrassing ourselves, and failure in general.
- Ironically, failure is one of the primary ways in which humans learn. And the more you learn, the more successful you can be.
Not believing that you can succeed. If we don’t think we can succeed, we won’t waste our time trying. Unfortunately, we’re not very good at predicting how well we can perform over the long term.
- This one is tricky, because you don’t know what you don’t know. The only reasonable course of action is to give it your best shot.
Giving up too soon. Persistence is one of the most powerful traits to have at your disposal. With small and consistent improvements, nearly any objective is achievable. Most people give up too soon to be successful.
Wanting to avoid the spotlight. Significant success draws attention, and many of us prefer the comfort of obscurity.
- If this reason is stopping you, realize that much of this concern only exists in your head. A few people might admire your success. A few people might be annoyed with your success. However, there are already people that admire you and people that are annoyed with you.

We all hate failure, but failure is educational. What’s most important is to keep trying and to understand why you failed.

A little more commitment and perseverance are often all you require to be much more successful than you’ve demonstrated in the past. Determine the most common cause of your past failures and vow to yourself that you’ll never fail again for that reason.

If you can eliminate all of these common causes of failure, you’ll be nearly unstoppable. Fail aggressively, but never fail to learn from your failures.

Book a 15-minute “Get to know you” call by clicking on the blue button below

and we can talk about how accepting failure and developing your goals from the lessons of your failure can help you achieve success in your life.

To your success

Michael

P.S. if you have always thought that you should have a Life Coach on your personal team to help you create the best year of your life but were put off by the cost and the time requirement, I have created a Self-paced course that covers what we would do when working together.

While not the same as working one-on-one with a Life Coach, this self-paced course can help you to understand your present situation, how you got there and how to set goals that will move you forwards to success.

Click on the logo below to find out more about the course

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Back to Basics: How to Develop a Positive Attitude

2021-07-182021-07-18 ~ adminlife

You know thinking positive is good for you, but it may be difficult to put that belief into action. Can you develop a sunny outlook when your bank account is almost empty or your boss is yelling at you?

The truth is you can control your attitude regardless of what is going on around you. Follow these practical steps for understanding yourself more clearly and making each day a more joyful and rewarding experience.

Understanding Your Attitude

Assess your personality. Your personality is your unique combination of qualities and traits, and your attitude is the way you decide to look at the world. While you can make fundamental changes, appreciating your basic nature helps you to focus your efforts and pick strategies that leverage your strengths.
Question your assumptions. Learn to distinguish between beliefs and facts so you can let go of your limitations. For example, you may be single, but unless you live on a deserted island there are other adults you could date, so it’s unrealistic to think that finding love is impossible.
Watch your language. Words are powerful. Choose statements that give you hope. Avoid exaggerations that turn minor irritations into major disasters.
Examine your relationships. Attitudes can be contagious. It’s easier to stay on track when your interactions with others affirm your value and increase your confidence. Share meaningful discussion and activities. Resolve conflicts promptly and limit complaining.
Manage stress. Pressure is part of life, but you can find constructive ways to let off steam and hold onto your inner peace. Set aside time to meditate or pray each day. Take a long walk or soak in a warm bath.
Stay fit. Honour the connection between your body and mind. It’s easier to feel enthusiastic when you’re eating a balanced diet, exercising regularly, and sleeping well.

Changing Your Attitude

Set specific goals. Identify one area at a time to work on. Lasting change takes time so you may want to aim for maintaining your new way of thinking for an hour or a day at a time to increase your chances of success.
Reframe challenges. Be prepared for obstacles. Let adversity teach you to take refuge in a constructive mindset instead of surrendering to external conditions. Look at the big picture and muster up your courage.
Seek support. You can accomplish more by teaming up with others. Let your family and friends know that you’re trying to create new patterns. You’ll be more likely to stick to your commitments. Ask for help when you need it.
Boost your motivation. Remember your purpose. The way you think defines your experiences. You can choose to be happier and more productive.
Move forward. Design a plan of action that will help you think differently and transform your old patterns. Take the first step. When you’re tempted to nag your spouse about an errand they forgot, switch your attention to the things you love about them. It will put the missing dry cleaning in perspective.
Reinforce your determination. Changing your attitude requires persistence. Just when you think you’ve become more patient or assertive, something triggers the old familiar response. Use setbacks as a teaching tool. Give yourself a reward for making an effort and celebrate each sign of progress.

Look on the bright side and take concrete action to create the outcomes you dream about. Make it a habit to replace each negative thought with an inspiring message. A positive attitude will make you happier and help you achieve more.

A positive attitude can move you forward in your life and career at an astonishing speed. You can develop a positive attitude by reviewing your beliefs and setting goals that can be attained.

Book a 15-minute “Get to know you” call by clicking on the blue button below

and we can talk about how you can make the changes necessary in your life to develop and carry forward a positive attitude.

To your success

Michael

P.S. if you have always thought that you should have a Life Coach on your personal team to help you create the best year of your life but were put off by the cost and the time requirement, I have created a Self-paced course that covers what we would do when working together.

Click on the logo below to find out more about the course

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How to Declutter Your Mind

2020-04-142020-04-14 ~ adminlife

Decluttering your life and becoming organized starts with one important but easily-overlooked step. You need to declutter your mind.

If your home and office are cluttered and disorganized, chances are your mind is too. Mental clutter is restless, moving from brooding over the past to worrying about the future. It’s going through your mental to-do list and fretting over having too much to do. Above all, mental clutter is exhausting and fruitless. It stops you from getting things done.

Here are some top tips for getting back in control and decluttering your mind.

Declutter your environment

If all you can see is chaos, your mind will be in overdrive all the time as there’s always something that needs doing. When you tidy up your space, things stop being overwhelming and you will be able to see if in fact anything needs doing.

Start keeping lists

Free up your mental space and keep anxiety at bay by writing lists. Checklists and to-do lists will keep your tasks ordered and allow you to prioritize. Use whatever method suits you best – a notebook, diary, wall planner, smartphone app or online tool.

Write it down

Get all those worries, ideas and what ifs out of your head by writing them down. That’s especially useful if you can’t sleep because your monkey mind has gone into overdrive. Keeping a journal will help you work through whatever is worrying you. Often things look a lot less worrisome when they’re on paper. In fact, studies have shown that writing problems down helps the brain to process and find solutions.

Leave the past behind

A lot of mind clutter is caused by brooding over past events, whether it’s past hurts or things you wish you had said or done, opportunities you wish you had taken or actions you regret. All of these preoccupations take up space and energy in your mind that could be available for much more creative projects. Worst of all, mulling over the past is fruitless. You can’t change the past, but you can let go of things that are distracting you in your present life.

Focus on one thing at a time

Lets’ face it, multitasking is overrated. Trying to answer an email, take a phone call and do your monthly budget all at once is likely to leave you with lots of things half-done and feeling exhausted. You’re much more likely to make mistakes and become overwhelmed. Focus on doing one thing at a time, and you will be calmer and have a completed to-do list of tasks completed properly.

There you are, 5 steps to declutter your life that can then lead you to live a more successful life and enjoy what you are doing now.

Let’s face it, decluttering our life sounds great but how do you manage the frustrations that occur daily?

The book: “When You Manage Your Frustrations You Change Your Life” can help you do just that.

You can find out more by clicking on the book title above.