Self improvement and success

self-improvementEverything that happens to us happens in purpose. And sometimes, one thing leads to another. Instead of locking yourself up in your cage of fears and crying over past heartaches, embarrassment and failures, treat them as your teachers and they will become your tools in both self improvement and success.

I remember watching Patch Adams – its my favorite movie, actually. Its one great film that will help you improve yourself. Hunter “patch” Adams is a medical student who failed to make it through the board exams. After months of suffering in melancholy, depression and suicidal attempts – he decided to seek for medical attention and voluntarily admitted himself in a psychiatric ward. His months of stay in the hospital led him to meeting different kinds of people. Sick people in that matter. He met a catatonic, a mentally retarded, a schizophrenic and so on. Patch found ways of treating his own ailment and finally realized he has to get back on track. He woke up one morning realizing that after all the failure and pains he has gone through, he still want to become the a doctor. He carries with himself a positive attitude that brought him self improvement and success. He didn’t only improved himself, but also the life of the people around him and the quality of life. Did he succeed? Needless to say, he became the best damn doctor his country has ever known.

So, when does self improvement become synonymous with success? Where do we start? Take these tips, friends:

*Stop thinking and feeling as if you’re a failure, because you’re not. How can others accept you if YOU can’t accept YOU?

*When you see hunks and models on TV, think more on self improvement, not self pitying. Self acceptance is not just about having nice slender legs, or great abs. Concentrate on inner beauty.

*When people feel so down and low about themselves, help them move up. Don’t go down with them. They’ll pull you down further and both of you will end up feeling inferior.

*The world is a large room for lessons, not mistakes. Don’t feel stupid and doomed forever just because you failed on a science quiz. There’s always a next time. Make rooms for self improvement.

*Take things one at a time. You don’t expect black sheep’s to be goody-two-shoes in just a snap of a finger. Self improvement is a one day at a time process.

*Self improvement results to inner stability, personality development and dig this – SUCCESS. It comes from self confidence, self appreciation and self esteem.

* Set meaningful and achievable goals. Self improvement doesn’t turn you to be the exact replica of Cameron Diaz or Ralph Fiennes. It hopes and aims to result to an improved and better YOU.

*Little things mean BIG to other people. Sometimes, we don’t realize that the little things that we do like a pat on the back, saying “hi” or “hello”, greeting someone “good day” or telling Mr. Smith something like “hey, I love your tie!” are simple things that mean so much to other people. When we’re being appreciative about beautiful things around us and other people, we also become beautiful to them.

*When you’re willing to accept change and go through the process of self improvement, it doesn’t mean that everyone else is. The world is a place where people of different values and attitude hang out. Sometimes, even if you think you and your best friend always like to do the same thing together at the same time, she would most likely decline an invitation for self improvement.

We should always remember that there’s no such thing as ‘over night success’. Its always a wonderful feeling to hold on to the things that you already have now, realizing that those are just one of the things you once wished for. A very nice quote says that “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.” We are all here to learn our lessons. Our parents, school teachers, friends, colleagues, officemates, neighbors; they are our teachers. When we open our doors for self improvement, we increase our chances to head to the road of success.

To your success

Michael W

Michael W

P.S. Are you frustrated that you are not reaching your ultimate level of success? Do you desire to be more confident and successful? Fantastic. Let me help you.

As a Life Coach, I want to make sure that you achieve all of your goals and desires to become the powerful person you know you are inside. Bring that confident person outside to take charge of your life. Let me buy you a 30 minute session so that we can talk together to determine how to move you forward.

Simply email me at [email protected] to get started now.

Are you ready to reach the level of success that you know you desire?


Check out the latest Amazon Bestsellers...

12 Rules for Life
12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos
by Jordan B. Peterson (Author, Narrator), Norman Doidge - foreword M.D. (Author), Random House Canada (Publisher)
4.7 out of 5 stars(815)

Buy new: $36.33 $31.95

 

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life
by Mark Manson (Author), Roger Wayne (Narrator), HarperAudio (Publisher)
4.5 out of 5 stars(3036)

Buy new: $23.95 $22.95

 

Unfuk Yourself
Unfu*k Yourself
by Gary John Bishop (Author, Narrator), Harper Audio (Publisher)
4.5 out of 5 stars(472)

Buy new: $18.24 $16.95

 

How to
How to Win Friends & Influence People
by Dale Carnegie (Author), Andrew MacMillan (Narrator), Simon & Schuster Audio (Publisher)
4.7 out of 5 stars(7961)

Buy new: $31.93 $23.95
193 used & new from $23.95

 

The Power of Habit
The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business
by Charles Duhigg (Author), Mike Chamberlain (Narrator), Random House Audio (Publisher)
4.5 out of 5 stars(4497)

Buy new: $28.00 $23.95
152 used & new from $23.95

 

7-habits-feature

 

Improve Self-Confidence – Model the 7 Habits of Highly Self-Confident People

By Dr. Camelia Furlan

7-habitsThere is no doubt that one sure way to improve self-confidence is to model highly self-confident people.

Self-confidence is all about believing in yourself, your own worth, your power and abilities, regardless of the situation you are in.

A lot of people believe that self-confidence comes from the possession of high skill sets or knowledge. While being excellent in a particular area of expertise can give you a sense of high self-worth, it is not a necessarily a prerequisite for self-confidence.

People who have high self-confidence have a strong sense of assurance and belief in themselves. They exude calmness, composure and self-awareness, and that is because, they have formed a set of habits that have become part of who they are and how they live their life.

So, let’s look at these habits in more detail:

HABIT 1: Keep Your Word – To Yourself And Others

This sounds very simple – but often it isn’t.

For example, how often do you tell yourself you’re going to do something and then you don’t, like exercise perhaps? How often do you NOT keep your promise to others?

Whenever this happens, not only is there an underlying feeling of dissatisfaction within yourself but also you are providing your subconscious mind with evidence that you don’t do what you say you will… that you are someone whom can not be trusted.

This is incredibly destructive to your self-confidence, because you don’t get to trust and know who you say you are and do. You say one thing, but don’t deliver, and this costs you your trust in yourself and your self-confidence.

High self-confident people understand the importance of keeping their word. They understand that coming from this space of integrity, where their word is law, IS the key to accessing their own power and self-confidence, and in my opinion, is also the most important habit that leads to success in life.

The trick is to start making smaller promises that you know you won’t let yourself or others down. Be honest with yourself. Don’t say yes to something when you know you can’t fit it in.

Baby steps are the key here. If you try to do too much too soon, you will inevitably let something slip, and guess who will be watching?

HABIT 2: Choose Positive Self Talk

The primary keyword here is CHOOSE. No matter how many successes we have or how many things we do well, we continually doubt ourselves and our abilities.

It might have something to do with the fact that over 75% of what we think is negative, which is completely counterproductive. With these kinds of statistics, it’s no wonder we struggle to feel good about ourselves.

One of the most important changes we can make in our life is choosing our self-talk.

Highly self-confident people have learned the habit of catching negative thoughts before they can have an effect on their moods, feelings and performance. They consciously choose to cancel these thoughts and replace them with positive empowering thoughts instead.

They have formed the habit of saying: stop, cancel or pass, whenever they catch a negative thought… not giving any power to that thought… not reacting to it.

Affirmations are a very powerful way of re-educating our minds to think empowering thoughts rather than the counterproductive negative thoughts.

So CHOOSE to improve self-confidence by choosing positive thoughts and practice these using affirmations.

HABIT 3: Focus On Your Strengths

Lack of self-confidence is a result of losing sight of our great qualities, and exaggerating our flaws instead.

High self-confident people know their strength and focus on what they can do, rather than what they can’t.

When you think you are not good at something, try to consciously focus on the qualities that you have that are important to carry out that task.

For example, if you are doing public speaking and are not confident at delivering a speech, but you are a great researcher, writer and organiser… focus on these attributes instead, and know that you can be confident and proud of the content of that speech. Focusing on the great content will make the delivery of the speech less significant.

HABIT 4: Be Courageous

Get out of your head and just do it!

Low self-confident people tend to procrastinate and worry. They end up being hung up over negative outcomes and failures of the past, and they can’t seem to find the courage to move forward.

Highly self-confident people have learned that in order to succeed, they can create the possibility of being courageous anytime they want… this way, even if they are afraid, they can choose to take action… in spite of fear!

You see COURAGE is not acting without fear; courage is acting in spite of fear.

When you make it a habit of being courageous you will increase self-confidence, because you are more likely to give the things you want a go, and when you are more focused on the doing rather than the thinking and worrying, you’ve overcome half the battle.

HABIT 5: Act and Feel Important

High self-confidence people have a habit of thinking highly of themselves through the way they behave and the image they portray. They have high levels of energy.

If we were to look at their behaviour, you will notice that self-confident people stand up for themselves and speak up when it is appropriate.

The image of self-confidence is also portrayed by the physiology and body language, by way they look after their body and the way they dress.

Do you see many self-confident people who walk around with slumped shoulders and are dressed badly?

No one is more conscious of your physical appearance than you are, so make it a priority to look good and feel important.

Here are some basic things you can do at the physical level to improve self-confidence… by modeling the image that highly self-confident people portray:

  1. Good posture – walk confidently, stand up straight and tall with shoulders back and head up, and make eye contact.
  2. Dress sharp – look presentable and smart. When you are dressed well, doesn’t that instantly make you feel great and important?
  3. Get your energy up – listen to upbeat music to instantly get energy up, and exercise regularly. Not only will exercise give you energy, but also the side effect is… great physical appearance… which will also help to improve self-confidence.

HABIT 6: Be Grateful

There is no doubt that High Self-Confident people have an attitude of gratitude. I’m talking about heartfelt gratitude and not so much about forced gratitude, because… there is a difference.

How do you recognize the difference between forced gratitude and heartfelt gratitude?

If you’ve ever expressed gratitude by starting a sentence with, “At least… ” you understand the meaning of forced gratitude. For example… at least I have food on the table, or… at least I have a good job, etc. We force ourselves to feel grateful, but this is coming from emptiness and it isn’t a long-lasting habit, because as soon as our circumstances change, we may not feel the same.

Heartfelt gratitude is a much deeper feeling. It is a feeling of appreciation and connection with life itself, which when present, gratitude triggers positive feedback loops.

This is the secret habit that high self-confidence people rely on to get access to this amazing positive mental attitude that they have.

So, to improve self-confidence start the habit of being grateful.

An exercise you can do everyday is to spend 5 minutes acknowledging the small things you like about yourself, things that make you feel self-confident and successful right now.

You can write these down in a gratitude journal and review them weekly.

Another powerful thing to do is find an unsuspecting or unlikely target to unleash your gratitude upon.

Gratitude often works best where you would least expect it to. Perhaps you can show appreciation or be grateful to a friend or family member, or you have seen a beautiful tree or flower that brightens your day, perhaps appreciate your favourite song, or a really good hug… you will be surprised how many things you will find that you can appreciate and be grateful for everyday!

HABIT 7: Focus On Contributing To Others

People with low self-confidence tend to focus too much time on their own problems and flaws, they undervalue what they are capable of, and spend too much time being critical of themselves.

They get caught up in this kind of thinking and as a result feel low in self-confidence.

High self-confident people focus on the needs of other people, they take the attention away from themselves and focus on how they can be of service and contribute to others.

The more they contribute to the world, the more they are rewarded with personal recognition and success.

So, to help increase self-confidence, the one thing you can do IS stop focusing on yourself and start contributing and helping others.

By the way, do you want to learn more about how to improve self confidence and get abundance and success in your life?

If so, download my FREE Mini E-mail Course [http://howdoyougetselfconfidence.com/01-2/] and Discover the 7 STEPS towards Self-Confidence Mastery

To your success

Michael W

Michael W

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/expert/Dr._Camelia_Furlan/1165606

http://EzineArticles.com/?Improve-Self-Confidence—Model-the-7-Habits-of-Highly-Self-Confident-People&id=7244265

 

 

The Powers of a Positive Attitude

positive_attitudeI am going to ask you to something very weird right now. First of all, I want you to listen to your thoughts. Now tell me, what thoughts fill your head? Would you label them as positive, or negative?

Now let’s say you are walking down the street with these thoughts. Do you think anyone who would meet you would be able to tell you what’s on your mind?

The answer to number one is up to you. But, the answer number two can be pretty generic. Although people will not be able to tell you exactly what you think, they will more or less have an idea of how you are feeling.

Here’s another question. When you enter a party filled with friends, do they all fall silent as if something terrible had happened? Or does everybody there perk up as if waiting for something exciting to happen?

You know what? The answer to all these depends on your frame of mind.

Thoughts are very powerful. They affect your general attitude. The attitude you carry reflects on your appearance, too – unless, of course, you are a great actor.

And it doesn’t end there. Your attitude can also affect people around you.

The type of attitude you carry depends on you. It can be either positive or negative.

Positive thoughts have a filling effect. They are admittedly invigorating. Plus, the people around the person carrying positive thoughts are usually energized by this type of attitude.

Negative thoughts on the other hand have a sapping effect on other people. Aside from making you look gloomy and sad, negative thoughts can turn a festive gathering into a funeral wake.

A positive attitude attracts people, while a negative attitude repels them. People tend to shy away from those who carry a negative attitude.

We can also define attitude as the way of looking at the world. If you choose to focus on the negative things in the world, more or less you have a negative attitude brewing up. However, if you choose to focus on the positive things, you are more likely to carry a positive attitude.

You have much to gain from a very positive attitude. For one, studies have shown that a positive attitude promotes better health. Those with this kind of attitude also have more friends. projecting a positive attitude also helps one to handle stress and problems better than those who have a negative attitude.

A positive attitude begins with a healthy self-image. If you will love the way you are and are satisfied, confident, and self-assured, you also make others are around feel the same way.

A negative attitude, on the other hand, has, of course, an opposite effect. So, carrying a negative attitude has a twofold drawback. You feel bad about yourself, and you make others feel the same way.

If you want to have a positive attitude, you have to feature healthy thoughts. This is probably very hard to do nowadays since, all around us, the media feeds us nothing but negative thoughts. A study shows that for every 14 things a parent says to his or her child, only one is positive. This is truly a saddening thought.

If you want a healthier outlook in life, you need to think happy thoughts, and you have to hear positive things as well. So, what can you do? Well, for starters, you could see a funny movie, you could play with children, spend some time telling jokes with friends. All these activities fill you with positive stimuli, which in turn promotes positive attitude.

Although it is impossible to keep ourselves from the negative things around us, you can still carry a positive attitude by focusing on the good things, the positive things in life.

And this positive attitude you now carry can be of benefit to other people. Sometimes when other people feel down, the thing people mostly do is try to give them advice. But sometimes, all they need is somebody to sit by them, and listen to them. If you have a positive attitude you may be able to cheer them up without even having to say anything.

If a positive attitude is really great, why do people choose to adopt a negative attitude instead? One who carries a negative attitude may be actually sending a signal for attention. Before you get me wrong, feeling sad, angry, or gloomy is not wrong itself. But dwelling on these thoughts for far too long is not healthy either. There is a time to mourn.

As always, if you are beset by troubles, even in your darkest hour, focus on the good things in life, you will always have hope. Problems become something you can overcome.

You do not have much to lose by adopting a healthy, positive attitude. Studies show that such an attitude actually retards aging, makes you healthier, helps you develop a better stress coping mechanism, and has a very positive effect on all the people you meet every day. So, what’s not to like about a positive attitude? Adopt one today.

To your success

Michael W

Michael W

 

P.S. Are you frustrated that you are not reaching your ultimate level of success? Do you desire to be more confident and successful? Fantastic. Let me help you.

As a Life Coach, I want to make sure that you achieve all of your goals and desires to become the powerful person you know you are inside. Bring that confident person outside to take charge of your life. Let me buy you a 30 minute session so that we can talk together to determine how to move you forward.

Simply email me at [email protected] to get started now.

Are you ready to reach the level of success that you know you desire?

Projecting Confidence – Even if You Don’t Feel It

projecting confidenceThat old saying, “Fake it ‘til you make it,” has never been more meaningful than when dealing with confidence issues. Confidence is the most important personality trait you can develop in order to better deal with life’s transitions – both personal and professional – and to take risks to ensure your continued success. Some ways to project confidence, even if you don’t feel it, include:

Be optimistic – Do you see the glass as half-empty or half-full? If you see the glass as half-empty, you’re likely not an optimist and could experience feelings of low self-worth and doubts. Seeing the glass as half-full places you in the “optimist” category and shows that you look for opportunity rather than failure.

Don’t take yourself too seriously – When you allow yourself to loosen up and enjoy life, you’re more relaxed in demeanor and most people find that refreshing. Most of us have to deal with stress and intense situations every day, so to be around someone who can relax is a real pleasure and can garner admiration.

Pay attention to others – Making eye contact and listening intently to those you’re engaged with is a must when attempting to project confidence. If you constantly look around the room or up at the ceiling when you’re conversing, you seem less trustworthy and less like someone who demands admiration.

Dress the part – Whatever you want to succeed at in life requires a certain look. Want to rise to a CEO level in your company? Stop dressing in jeans and t-shirts. Show others – with your looks – that you’re ready to step into the position, even if you’re much lower on the ladder.

Watch your language – When you speak, speak clearly and watch your own language to be sure you’re not using buzz words or contradictory language or interject phrases such as “you know…” That’s referred to as “conversational clutter” and should be avoided at all cost.

Accept and give compliments – Accept compliments about your accomplishments gracefully and give compliments to others when warranted. Accepting compliments show that you realize the value in what you’ve done and giving compliments show that you consider yourself a good judge of character.

Projecting a certain amount of confidence, even when you don’t feel it, shows that you’re ready to meet challenges head-on. Sometimes, we don’t yet have the knowledge or skills it takes to perform at the top of the game, but you can project determination and enthusiasm to meet the challenge.

To your success

Michael W

Michael W

P.S. Are you frustrated that you are not reaching your ultimate level of success? Do you desire to be more confident and successful? Fantastic. Let me help you.

As a Life Coach, I want to make sure that you achieve all of your goals and desires to become the powerful person you know you are inside. Bring that confident person outside to take charge of your life. Let me buy you a 30 minute session so that we can talk together to determine how to move you forward.

Simply email me at [email protected] to get started now.

Are you ready to reach the level of success that you know you desire?

 

(feature image – Photo by Olu Eletu on Unsplash)

Did You Check Your Confidence Level?

confidence - feature

confidenceWould you like to be confident? Your answer may be – YES.

I do want to be confident.

However, this answer lacks the impact. It is too generalized.

Just like everybody wants to do well in life and be rich but not many ever realize this wish. This is because to actually get somewhere in life, you need to quantify your confidence. You need to define the task for which you need to be confident so that you can execute it successfully.

A mere wish to be confident won’t take you anywhere. The dream must have a deadline as well!

Self Confidence might mean different things to different people groups.

For a child it might mean to be able to recite the poem to her teacher the next morning. For a business executive it might mean to be able to present the business report to the Board of Directors.

For a salaried person it may be the ability to be able to make a switch over from his secure job to a new independent venture and so on. To execute their respective tasks, these people need a certain level of confidence, which would see them through.

Every task requires a minimum level of confidence to be able to be executed. Do you have a task in your mind to be done? Do you have the level of confidence required? Let us check it out!

Following is a simple questionnaire. You have to answer to these in a YES or NO

1. Does it happen too often with you that you cannot take a decision all by yourself and you seem to look for your colleagues, friends, or your spouse to sort the matter for you?
2. Do you always seem to be in perpetual need of a support system wherein you can feel secure?
3. Do you just sit and listen all the times in your office meetings?
4. Do you feel difficulty in reporting a matter to your boss or you have an excellent idea that can improve your company’s efficiency but you cannot muster enough courage to go and talk about it to your Boss?
5. Are you terrified to meet someone new? Is public speaking your worst nightmare?
6. Do you timidly accept orders from your superior even though you know that you are already overloaded and you need to say no?
7. Are you excessively concerned about what other people think of you?
8. Do you fear taking risks?
9. Do you feel dissatisfied about your appearance?
10. Are you uncomfortable in social gatherings – being amongst lots of people?

If you happen to answer these questions with a Yes, you seem to have a confidence crisis that might become an obstacle in successfully executing your tasks.

Don’t Panic, as it is good that you found out since now you are aware of a potential problem of your life. The very fact that you are aware of your confidence rating makes you ready to take further action and work towards eliminating the negative effects of low confidence levels and work towards building your self confidence.

Here are some more questions you may answer.

1. Have you accomplished anything in the past?
2. Are you the one to go ahead and break the ice at a new place or wait for someone else to initiate a discussion?
3. Do you feel you are well respected by others?
4. Do you think you have the potential to succeed?
5. Are you a happy and loving person?
6. Are you satisfied with your career graph?
7. Are you satisfied with your skills and qualifications?
8. Do you feel in control of your life?
9. Do you imagine yourself to be more successful five years from now?
10. Do you feel that you are a worthwhile person?

If you happen to answer most of these questions with a NO, you have LOW self-confidence levels.

However, a YES is never decisive and a NO is never final. One needs to constantly maintain the good points and work towards converting bad points into good points. And the good news is that it is very much possible.

It’s important that you honestly answer the questions above, since only when you realize the present status of your self-confidence would you be working towards building self-confidence or maintaining and increasing your present levels.

To your success

Michael W

Michael W

 

 

P.S. Are you frustrated that you are not reaching your ultimate level of success? Do you desire to be more confident and successful? Fantastic. Let me help you.

As a Life Coach, I want to make sure that you achieve all of your goals and desires to become the powerful person you know you are inside. Bring that confident person outside to take charge of your life. Let me buy you a 30 minute session so that we can talk together to determine how to move you forward.

Simply email me at [email protected] to get started now.

Are you ready to reach the level of success that you know you desire?